Thursday, March 26, 2015

My Faith is Weak

Today is Spiritual Journey Thursday, a day for me to spend some time turning toward God.  Please feel free to join me on this journey each Thursday with Holly Mueller and friends.  For the next several weeks, Holly will be featuring our one little words.  Today's featured word is Exercise by Mary Hill.  

I have been away from this blog for awhile.  I could list excuses, but I won't.  I wasn't planning on writing today, but God had other plans.  My words tonight are raw; my hurt is fresh once again.

Last fall my trust and my faith were shaken by a dear friend.  

He made a mistake that has lifelong consequences for him, his family, his friends, and a young girl.

Tonight I saw him for the first time since the incident.  

I had to make a split-second decision 

~do I speak or turn my back.

I chose to speak.  

It was awkward.

I asked him how he was doing and he replied, taking one day at a time.

He said, I read your blog post.  You have no idea how much your words mean to me.

I said thank you.  Take care.

He touched my arm like old friends do, and I tried to make it out of the store 

~without breaking down.

My heart aches.  

My heart hurts.  

My heart weeps.

    ~ for him, his sweet family, and the young girl.

Through all the hurt and attempts at forgiveness, 

I can't forget her.

I want to understand.  

I want things to be back to the way they were.

They can't.

~My faith is weak.

My grace is sufficient for you, my power is made perfect in weakness. ~ 2Corinthians 12:9


  1. What a tough situation! I don't know if I could say anything else except the verse you wrote at the end.

  2. Oh my goodness, Leigh Anne. Like Jaana, I don't know what to say except for that perfect verse at the end. It says it all. I'm so glad you wrote today. Some days we just need to express hurt and doubt. That's okay. It is sufficient.

  3. I can only chime with no wisdom or insight, but a wish for grace and mercy for all involved. Thank you for your vulnerable sharing.

  4. I see why you were drawn back to your Turn blog. This is a turn that needed writing.

  5. I love that you wrote about this. I'm sorry for the pain and I have no words of comfort...but I'm here...we are here for you. Praying. That's what God offers...even when we see ourselves as weak, as failing. I see you as brave. Strong. Fighting for your faith! Sending HUGS to my brave friend!!